Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Something That's on My Heart

Taking a small break from the direct Proverbs 31 study to share something that has come to light in my life. I'm just sharing what God has shown me when I am willing to listen.

Being a military wife, I have been without my husband alot. And you know what I never miss when he's gone? Getting my way. Being right. Arguing with him.

No, when my husband was in Korea for a year while I was pregnant with our first child, I never once said "Gosh, I wish Chris were here so I could show him what a smart wife he has/how lucky he is to have me". No, I cried for what seemed to be a solid 2 months for him to come home and hold me, to be my protector, my best friend, to share laughs and love with him. During his million and two times away from home, I do not sit awake at night thinking how I got one over on him during our argument that day, or how mad I am at him for not helping me with a diaper change. Nope. I sit and face 3 weeks without him thinking about how far away he is and how much I wish I could just smell his skin or kiss his lips, or feel his arms around me, or have the peaceful knowledge that he lies sleeping next to me in the bed. My tears are not because I am mad at him for not understanding me during some pitifully unimportant disagreement, they are because the love of my life is not HERE.

I do so wish that life would not get in the way of seeing that the most important thing is that my husband, my sweet love, is here--that we are together. When he is away somehow the meaningless just becomes more so. I want to treat everyday like I am simply glad to have my husband with me in the day to day. To not be bothered with the petty slights that I have perceived coming from him. To extend him more grace. This is the desire of my heart at this very moment: to see my husband, and time with him, as so precious that no little "need" of mine could ever rise up to be important enough to ever cause strife between us again. I know that may never happen, but in the light of the truly important on this earth, isn't it just wasting time to argue over the little things rather than to make memories of times spent in harmony?


Luke said...

Wow. That's good stuff.

My wife is going to visit her family for a week, since her grandmother just died, and I think you're right: I'm not going to miss complaining about dinner time or bedtime. I will miss her.

"I do so wish that life would not get in the way of seeing that the most important thing is...that we are together." Agreed.


Erin said...

Great reminder of the things that are really important!

Cherishing My Days said...

thanks, luke. may your time away from your wife make being with her more sweet.

erin, yes, separation makes the important things rise to the top--sorta like cream on milk. lol.